MAMA’S LAST MONTHS

outside our apartment
Mama, December 2013

 

It has been a little over a year now since we lost our dear Mama. I found this poem I had worked on before and wanted to post it. The last days are hard, but I am thankful that I was part of them.

 

 

MAMA’S LAST MONTHS
She walks slower now,
unsteady unless she has her walker.
She forgets to use it;
I watch carefully so she won’t fall;
She talks more quietly,
so it is hard to follow her thoughts.
She doesn’t understand when I ask her
to clarify what she is telling me.
Her attention wanders more easily;
The Waltons doesn’t hold it as well.
Her favorite place to go is the donut shop.
She wants to order two donuts,
even though she doesn’t even finish one,
and only drinks a couple sips of her coffee,
even though donuts and coffee are her favorite foods.
Arthritis pain assaults her neck;
it is her constant companion.
Time seems a blur to her–
who came and when, it puzzles her.
It seems it is time for her to go home,
but God hasn’t called her yet.
She feels her life has no purpose now,
I must admit I don’t understand either,
but God has His mysteries, dealt in wisdom.
And in His wisdom, He has me here,
caring for her, teaching me through the pain of love
that He does indeed care for her.

Darlene Estlow©2014

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